Things Anime Have Taught Me #11

“You can’t bind something with wings to the earth. It’s nothing but futile resistance.” – Nishizono (Little Busters)

In my opinion the meaning of life is simple: To develop wings and learn to fly.

By which I mean: Find your passion and make something of it.

A life without passion is a life un-lived in my eyes. So many have been convinced that we need to get a steady job and earn enough money to afford a house, partner and kids. Which is all fine if that’s what you want, but it’s not the only outcome, and getting a well-paid, stable, monotonous job is most certainly not the only way. If anything it should be your last, last resort.

There is a definite difference between a ‘job’ and a ‘career’, and for me that difference is passion. A job is something you do to earn money, a career is something you do because you love it. When you’re in school adults tell you to graduate and get a job. When what they should be telling you is to find your passion and turn it into your career. We all have at least one passion in life, whether it’s obvious to us or takes some introspection. Our only challenge then is to work out how to turn it into a career.

Now more than ever we’re beginning to realise there isn’t a definitive list of jobs to choose from, we can create our own ‘job roles’ and tailor them to suit us. Never compromise when it comes to your future career. Never let anyone tell you “that’s not a proper job”. Only you can decide that for yourself, if it brings you joy and fulfilment then what’s the harm?

“Don’t go where the path may lead, go instead where there is no path…and leave a trail” – Ralph Waldo Emerson

Once you’ve grown your wings it’s time to learn to fly. Work out what you want to do with that passion of yours and how you want to change the world with it. This may seem like an impossible task, but that’s only because so many have this fallacy drilled into them by the same people telling them they can’t do it.

If you’re creating a new career that doesn’t already exist, then how can someone tell you it wont work? How can they deem it a waste of time when no one has previously attempted it? And if there are already others out there doing your chosen career then it clearly isn’t a waste of time.

“Never interrupt someone doing something you said couldn’t be done.” – Amelia Earhart

The key to life is to have fun, people take life far too seriously. Yes serious things happen, but were it not for them we’d have no juxtaposition to judge joy by. If your life leaves you feeling unfulfilled then there’s still work to be done. Don’t try to build your life around a job, build a job around your life.

Faith

“In spite of knowing,
Yet still believing.
Though no god above,
Yet god within.

There is no god in the sense of a cosmic father or mother who will provide all things to their children. Nor is there some heavenly bureaucracy to petition. These models are not descriptions of a divine order, but are projections from archetypal templates. If we believe in the divine as cosmic family, we relegate ourselves to perpetual adolescence. If we regard the divine as supreme government, we are forever victims of unfathomable officialdom.

Yet it does not work for us to totally abandon faith. It does not follow that we can forego all belief in higher beings. We need faith, not because there are beings who will punish us or reward us, but because gods are wonderful ways of describing things that happen to us. They embody the highest aspects of human aspiration. Gods on the altars are essential metaphors for the human spiritual experience.

Faith shouldn’t be shaken because bad things happen to us or because our loved ones are killed. Good and bad fortune are not in the hands of gods, so it is useless to blame them. Neither does faith need to be confirmed by some objective occurrence. Faith is self-affirming. If we maintain faith, then we have its reward. If we become better people, then our faith has results. It is we who created faith, and it is through our efforts that faith is validated.”

- Deng Ming-Dao (365 Tao Daily Meditations)

This was today’s meditation and I felt it wonderfully summarised my opinion in regards to God and Faith. I’ve personally never been able to conceive of or believe in a nonspecific deity in the heavens that governs the earth and mankind. I may sometimes refer to God in various forms to people of various beliefs. I often use phrases like “Masha’Allah” and “Insha’Allah” to my Muslim friends.

All I’m doing is tailoring the word to their preference. Whenever I refer to God in any which way, what I’m actually referring to is The Source. Which for me is the one universal soul from which we are all born and to which we all return when we die. I believe we are all one soul, the “cells of humanity” as Peace Pilgrim refers to it. This is essentially a Taoist and also Buddhist view.

In place of God when I speak about it from my own viewpoint I choose the title ‘Universe’, governed by the flow of Tao. I don’t pray in the traditional sense but I do share words with the Universe, the Moon, Wind, Rain, Sun etc. Never asking anything, as I feel ‘prayer’ should only ever be a way to give thanks and show gratitude. Which I do regularly.

“Prayer is when you talk to God; meditation is when you listen to God.” - Diana Robinson

I don’t believe that doing so will necessarily change anything or make anything better. I do it to perpetuate a sense of gratitude within myself for the world I live in and for the Universe as a whole. I have faith that every hardship I face has been presented to me by the Universe to aid in my spiritual growth.

I don’t believe fate in the traditional rigid sense either. I feel we form our own fate by the decisions we make. We need only go with the flow of Tao and take whatever stands in our way and overcome it. This way we can live in harmony with Tao and continue down our path, becoming stronger as we journey on.

I’m not sure whether I can accept that “everything happens for a reason” but I can accept that whatever does happen there is a lesson to be learnt in there somewhere and the chance for spiritual growth. You could argue they’re one and the same, but sometimes things need to be re-worded for the mind to accept.

Joy. Instinct. Necessity.

“Life is a series of natural and spontaneous changes. Don’t resist them – that only creates sorrow. Let reality be reality. Let things flow naturally forward in whatever way they like.” – Lao Tzu

There are innumerable formula for life, either developed by yourself or learnt and taken on from others. Sometimes you arrive at them independently, other times you take bits from what you experience and build them from what works, discarding what doesn’t [for you]. Recently I decided to sit down and think about what mine was, I’ve been living it for so long but never really meditated on it before. This is the simplified formula I arrived at.

Base all life decisions on one of these three aspects: Joy, Instinct or Necessity.

I spent time analysing what motivates the life decisions I make and realised they all fall into one of these three categories. The majority of my decisions are motivated by Joy, I ask myself “Will this make me happy, will it be fun?” and if the answer is yes I’ll most likely do it. I’m naturally very playful by nature, and this tends to be my main motivator.

But sometimes we’re forced to do things that we don’t find fun (paying taxes/bills, working unsatisfying jobs, pay rent/mortgages etc). These things are often unavoidable but we must do them out of responsibility as adults. These acts fall under the category of Necessity.

Lastly I realised there are times when I make decisions not based on Joy or Necessity. Sometimes I’ll just feel it in my soul that I should do something. I can never really pin point an exact reason why but I just know I should do it. I attribute these acts to my Instinct. Occasionally your heart will just tell you to do something, you can’t comprehend why but you don’t argue, you just do it. Decisions made out of Instinct are rarely regretted. Even if the outcome appears negative, it will no doubt be an experience you needed in order to further your spiritual growth. You’ll look back on these seemingly bad decisions later in life and be grateful you made them.

This is the formula I live my life by, some of you may decide to try this out for yourself. I encourage you to experiment, even if not with this one, then another. If you feel you are in need of a formula for living your life that is. Some of you may already have a formula but haven’t sat down to contemplate it yet. If you already have a different one to mine, feel free to let me know about it in the comments below, I’d love to hear it.

If you are confronted by a decision with an outcome that will not further yourself (or others) spiritually, emotionally, intellectually, do not strive for it, unless it is absolutely necessary.

Free Air! – Buddy Wakefield

“If you pull a bent breath
through the second hole of a harmonica
tuned to the key of Georgia
while a train moves by on the tail end of dusk
there is a good chance
you will finally know what it means to rest.”

“It takes a long time to make love to someone who hates themselves.”

Be Who You Already Are

“To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment.” – Ralph Waldo Emerson

Being yourself is both a simple concept and also one of the bravest things you can do. In a society where you’re told how you should talk, dress, look, act and think, being who you actually are is bordering on courageous, which is an utterly ridiculous notion when you consider it.

From a young age most of us learn to build walls around ourselves to serve as our protectors, we craft masks to wear to conceal our true identities, too afraid to be judged so we make ourselves what we assume people want from us. We focus so much on being liked/accepted by others/society that we neglect to ask ourselves what we want, who we really are. And what makes us happy. We assume being accepted will make us happy. But when it’s at the cost of our true identities, that happiness is short-lived, a fallacy.

The best example I feel of this is when we develop feelings for someone. We immediately begin to tailor ourselves to what we think will best impress and attract them, we do whatever we feel we need to win them over. Spending ages crafting and re-drafting everything we say to them over text/internet and thinking carefully before we speak. Asking ourselves the same questions: Will that impress them? Will this give them the wrong idea? Will this scare them off? What do they want to hear?

The irony of this is paramount. Trying to attract someone by becoming someone else is sure to fail, you can’t keep up the facade forever, and if you can, then they will never truly know you, nor will you be truly happy. When the day comes they finally pull back the curtain and see the one operating the microphone, will they be happy with what they find? Or will they be presented with nothing but a lie, and leave you to find what they’re looking for elsewhere?

Instead of doing or saying what you feel another person will appreciate more, do and say what is in your heart. Being true to yourself is the true mark of bravery and courageousness. You may not think it but people will respect you much more for it, even if they don’t agree with what you do, say, stand for etc. They will at the very least respect you for being honest and true to yourself, and if they don’t then they’re only jealous they cannot do the same.

“Follow your inner moonlight; don’t hide the madness.” – Allen Ginsberg

Likewise the only way you will attract the sort of partner that is best for you is by being yourself, wholly and completely. If the person you set your sights on isn’t interested in the real you? Forget them. They weren’t the one for you. But simply by being yourself you will eventually attract someone who will love and respect you for who you are. And if you can show them the same in return, you’ve found real, lasting Love.

Admittedly it is not always the best idea to say exactly how you think/feel in certain situations, that is what tact is for. But if you struggle with that then there is nothing wrong with being completely open and honest to begin with, and then learn tact through those experiences. If you have said something you shouldn’t you will soon find out. Take that experience and learn from it. Surely it’s better than saying things you don’t believe just to impress others?

“Be yourself, everybody else is already taken.” – Oscar Wilde

No matter how daunting a task it may seem, take one little step each day towards becoming who you are meant to be, who you already are. Everything you need to tackle life you already have inside you. All you need to do is turn your lamp inward and explore the endless beauty that is your individuality.